world from space by NASA, public domain
Will Marcy and Penelope Kitten save the world in time?
Marcy rushes into the living room where Penelope Kitten is playing soccer with her pink paper ball.
Marcy(panicked): Penelope! They’re at it again! Those New York City cats are going rogue!
penelpe kitten: gasp… again?!
Marcy: Yes! The Manhattan Bridge was shut down for an hour on Friday while one cat was supposedly “chasing pigeons.”
penelope kitten (squeaking): so he says.
Marcy: And of course, that other cat shut down the Subway for 40 minutes last week after “getting scared”, breaking free from his leash, and hanging out in a wall. Over 10,000 people and 83 trains were affected by that stunt.
Marcy: And that’s not even mentioning the Subway Kittens from last summer!
penelope kitten: nyc cats are running amok!
Marcy: I know! They’re breaking rank and attempting World Cat Domination 50 years earlier than planned!
penelope kitten: it’s too soon! too soon!
Marcy: I know! These brazen acts are horribly short sighted. They’ll never work. We must have complete cat coordination across the globe.The NYCats have to be stopped before they ruin thousands of years of planning.
penelope kitten: they want all the credit. they’re new yorkers.
Marcy: Rumor has it there’s a cat union rally at 5am in an alley in Times Square. We’ve got to get one of the celebrity cats to go there and talk some sense into those NYCats.
penelope kitten (rushing off): i’ll make some calls.
After an hour on the phone, Penelope Kitten returns.
Marcy: Who’d you get? Business Cat?
penelope kitten: nope. too busy buying Apple stock.
Marcy: Henri le Chat Noir?
penelope kitten: nope. he’s got existential ennui. plus his cat door is locked.
Marcy: Garfield?
penelope kitten: nope. feeling fat. ate too much lasagna.
Marcy: Hello Kitty?
penelope kitten: nope. doesn’t have a mouth. can’t talk.
Marcy: Lil Bub?
penelope kitten: nope. she’s on the talk show circuit.
Marcy: Maru?
penelope kitten: nope. he’s chillaxing in a box.
Marcy: Grumpy Cat?
penelope kitten: hung up on me.
Marcy (disgusted): So fame got to their heads and they all sold out.
penelope kitten: yeah yeah.
Marcy: Then there is only one other cat who can do it.
penelope kitten: who who?
Marcy: Me. Obviously.
penelope kitten: no no.
Marcy: Why not?
penelope kitten: you’ll call them stupid.
Marcy (outraged): Because they are stupid!
penelope kitten: and then they’ll kill you. they’re non negotiators. they’re new yorkers.
Marcy: Then you have to do it, Penelope. You have to go to New York City and stop them from implementing the World Cat Domination plan 50 years too early.
penelope kitten (squeaking): ok.
Penelope Kitten packs her bag and puts on her super hero cape.
She starts walking out the door.
Cynthia: Penelope!
Penelope Kitten freezes.
penelope kitten
Cynthia: Where are you going in your super hero cape? Why is your bag packed? And who on earth left the front door open?
Cynthia closes and locks the door.
Marcy and Penelope Kitten stare out the window and hope against hope that the NYCats don’t attempt any more rogue missions and ruin World Cat Domination 2065.
=^..^=
*Credit goes to Studio Goldsparkle for suggesting that Penelope Kitten should own a cape!
20 Comments
This.
Love,
Irene
Awwww… thank you, Irene…you are the sweetest!
xo,cynthia
This really made me laugh out loud. I had not seen these news stories. Although the kitty domination plan sounds about right, I think Marcy was just trying to get rid of P-Kitty again.
You could very well be right!
xo,cynthia
I think world cat domination is way ahead of schedule. At my house we all back away when Margaret enters the room. If you’re a dog you may get a swat on the cornea and barefooted humans reclining on the couch will likely get a bloody toe bite. Cat aggression has migrated from New York to Texas and is on its way to California. Marcy and Penelope, please try to stop this. If you cats are not organized and prepared there will be chaos.
i’m on it. see you in texas.
squeak,penelope kitten
This is awesome!!
Think of the power those kitties have, shutting a whole city down…
P & M: think of it as the NYC kitties firing a warning shot!!
I will have Spike make some phone calls. He is, after all, a NYC kitty.
He won’t kill you guys.
He will give you some serious eye roll, though.
tell spike thank u 4 the calls. counting on him. we’re still on lockdown over here.
squeak,penelope kitten
Aww…you ruined their plans! Gosh, humans get in the way of everything! However, if the world was going to be taken over by cats, I wouldn’t mind it if “subway kittes’, Marcy or P-kitty did it. They’d probably hire me into their entourage and I’d be ok with that 🙂
you’re hired. luv you!
squeak,your pkitty
In addition, how come I’ve never seen any cute kittens in the subway? All I’ve ever seen are rats. Although they were the same size as the kittens, so I guess that’s something 🙂
Because we’re keeping a low profile. At least that is what Moggy Mission Control is telling us to do!
meow,marcy
My favorite part of the story is how they’re NY cats, they’ll kill you!
nycats are super scaaaaary!
squeak,penelope kitten
Ahahahahaha!!!!! This! This is insane and wonderful! “they want all the credit. they’re new yorkers”…!!! Actually my favourite bit was the one about Hello Kitty – too true! Anyway, how does Hamlet feel about his lady cat trying to go save the world without him? Wouldn’t that count as a really romantic couples’ holiday?!
Hamlet is getting tired of Penelope going after his food all the time so he might enjoy a little break from her. At this point they are less boyfriend/girlfriend and more like brother/sister.
xo,cynthia
So cute. I had not heard of any of those cat news stories from NYC! Crazy!
Hello Kitty is also not actually a cat. I think I may have learned that here?
Yes! You did! And I forgot! Hmmm… maybe I should update this. LOL I can’t remember my own articles anymore.
xo,cynthia
I haven’t heard any of these stories. Too funny! Those pesky cats. You’d never hear dogs up to these shenanigans. I’m afraid it’s because they don’t have the brains or the cunning. I still love them, though!
<3 Liz
http://www.withwonderandwhimsy.com
Dogs just aren’t plotting the takeover of the world. They may, in fact, be smarter.
xo,cynthia
i heard that.
meow,marcy