Stayin’ Alive… Stayin’ Alive. .. Ah Ha Ha Ha. …
Marcy is reading the latest Covid-19 statistics in the newspaper while Cynthia peers out into the apartment courtyard from behind her curtains.
Marcy (shaking her head and sighing): Welcome to “twenty twenty too.”
Cynthia: Marcy! Don’t say it like that.
Marcy: Why not? Humans are doomed to repeat history. Obviously. You never learn.
Cynthia: Have a little hope. Have a little confidence in us. Geesh.
(Cynthia goes back to peering).
Marcy: It’s hard to have hope when we’re starting off the new year exactly like we did last year – with you sitting at home in your N95 mask and spying/gossiping on the neighbors.
Cynthia darts away from the curtains.
Cynthia: I’m not spying.
Marcy: Oh yeah? Who didn’t wear her mask while taking out the trash this morning?
Marcy: Who coughed in the stairway at 1:54pm?
Cynthia: One of the Frat Bros.
Marcy: And who left their laundry in the dryer 26 minutes past the timer going off leading to an awkward confrontation between the Tina the Tarot Card Reader/Chakra Cleaner/Ant-Vaxxer and Marvin the Mask Mandator who refuses to break down his Amazon boxes before pitching them into the recycle bin?
Cynthia: Crazy Chris, the improv actor.
Marcy: And how is this different from last year?
Just then Penelope Kitten bursts into the apartment. She’d been playing Red Light Green Light with the squirrels.
penelope kitten (squeaking): omg!
Marcy and Cynthia: What?
penelope kitten: you know the house across the street that burned down last year?
Marcy and Cynthia: yeah.
penelope kitten: neighbors are having a new years bbq next to the burnt out remains.
Cynthia: o…kaaaaay …
penelope kitten: and, they’re blasting “stayin’ alive” by the bee gees.
Five beats go by as Cynthia and the kitties process the scene.
Cynthia: I don’t know whether to immediately hide in a closet due to the ominous-ness of such a scene. Or, laugh hysterically at their brilliant fatalistic humor.
Marcy: Welcome to “twenty twenty too”.
Happy New Year, Our Pawsome Friends! May your 2022 be healthy, happy, and humorous!
(Marcy says gallows humor counts. And Penelope says toilet humor count too!)
xo, meow, squeak,
cynthia + marcy + penelope kitten
*Illustrations by Marina Daineko
* Photo by Marc Schaefer on Unsplash
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