Marcy Blames Bridgerton. …
2pm. Sunday afternoon.
Cynthia walks into the living room where Marcy and Penelope Kitten are soundly napping in sunspots.
Cynthia: Awww… so cute so cute so … Aaackkkk.
Cynthia trips over a chewed up mousey toy and lands face first into the cardboard scratcher full of catnip.
Cynthia: Ouch. Ewww … Ptooey. P .. P… Ptooey.
Marcy: Hey! Keep it down. We’re napping.
penelope kitten (yawning): ’s ok.
Cynthia (still spitting out catnip): P … P … Ptooey. Hey! Marcy! You should get a Nap Dress for all the afternoon naps you take. Ha Ha.
Cynthia stumbles off to clean up the catnip and cardboard from her face.
Marcy: Nap dresses are stupid.
penelope kitten (squeaking): what’s a nap dress?
Marcy: It’s technically a nightgown but is fitted at the bust with smocking. It’s got a large square milkmaid type neckline with billowy or ruffled sleeves.
Marcy: It looks simultaneously “little girl” and “matronly”. Why women want to look like elderly toddlers is beyond me.
penelope kitten: looks like you’d get tangled up in it if you took a nap in it.
Marcy: Napping isn’t the goal of the Nap Dress.
penelope kitten: then why’s it called a Nap Dress?
Marcy: The goal is to wear it out in public. At least that’s what Nell Diamond – founder of the brand Hill House that made the original Nap Dress says.
“They are a nightgown/dress hybrid; comfortable for sleeping, but can also be worn as regular clothes.”
penelope kitten: sounds like a marketing ploy.
Marcy: It’s working. They’re selling out everywhere. I blame Bridgerton.
Marcy: And the pandemic. Obviously, some women became so removed from reality as they sat in their rooms hiding from the plague and staring at their faces in bad Zoom lighting, they started hallucinating that they were actually IN Bridgerton. Nell Diamond, Doen, and even Target jumped at the chance to convince otherwise sane mortals that looking like a drugged out milkmaid from the early 19th century was the way to live your best life.
Cynthia wanders back in. She’s a little high from the catnip.
Cynthia: Ohhhhh are you looking at Nap Dresses? Ah, so romantic. I had a nightgown similar to this in the late 1980’s from Victoria’s Secret.
Cynthia: Sigh… I used to read Jane Austen novels while wearing it.
Marcy: Hmpf. At least you didn’t wear it out in public.
Cynthia (sadly): No.
Marcy: But you wanted to.
Cynthia (longingly): Yeah.
Marcy: What is it with modern American women wanting to wander around barefoot in nightgowns in English gardens?
penelope kitten (perusing the computer): hey hey. looks like Hill House trademarked the name, Nap Dress. i bet they’re making boo coo bucks.
Marcy: Good God.
penelope kitten: we should trademark something so we can make boo boo bucks too!
Cynthia: Like what?
penelope kitten: ummmm … like … “siesta sleepy socks” … or … “fuzzy frolicking frock” … or …
Cynthia: Tipsy Tulle Toga! For … you know … Happy Hour!
penelope kitten (squeaking): yeah yeah. i like to be happy!
Marcy: So stupid.
Marcy goes back to napping while Cynthia and Penelope Kitten excitedly plan their kitschy clothing empire …
Tipsy Tulle Toga
everyday modern ballerina attire
for the Happy Hour enthusiast in all of us!
(available in black, gold glitter, unicorn, and ballet pink)
The best thing about the nap dress is it hides my jelly belly, but I could do without the puffy sleeves.
I LOVE the Bridgerton dress. You’re right, Marcy. It makes me want to walk barefoot in an English garden.
The more I looked at them the more I started to like some of them. There’s one in navy blue with ruffled straps instead of billowy sleeves that doesn’t look too insane. I may be getting brainwashed. Don’t tell Marcy.
No doubt you like tea too.
Neil Diamond? Seriously? Weird.
I have to pass on the poofy sleeved dresses. I’m too well-endowed for all the poof next to my chest and these are just a little too delicate for me — they don’t go with all of my ink!
I would, however, wear the s*** out of a Tipsy Tulle Toga! With fishnets and combat boots!
Happy napping, Marcy!
Happy naps to you too. P and Cindy are still working on their new business venture. At least it keep P from hogging my sunspots.
These are awesome trademark ideas! The dresses look super cute and comfy, but I don’t think even I would wear them in public. They do make me want to take a nap in an English garden, though 🙂
You people and your English gardens.
Although … might be a nice place for a catnap and a mouse meal. Hmmm …
Nightgowns are awesome, but I think these look too snug on top, to be truly comfortable.
Exactly! I keep thinking about those smoked tube tops I wore as a little kid and haaaated them because they were tight and itched! Aaaackk!